I started writing this on the sixth day of placements, after getting frustrated with my performance in GDs and interviews. I retain the lines I first wrote, to give you a picture of how I felt, then.
“Six days gone and yet, not a sign of it coming. I am not writing this in pain but in frustration. Not the typical feeling of “How did this happen to me?” but the feeling “Why did this happen to me?” Do I deserve this situation? May be I do!”
On the first day was a consulting company’s test; the questions were more on probability than programming, but I got kicked out of the first shortlist. The fact that only computer science students were short-listed gave me solace. Next was S****, the only tech company I could ever think of getting in. There was an orientation session on the evening of the first day, and the PPT hall was more than full. We sat with our legs pressed against the chairs before us, listening to the way the interview was to proceed the next morning.
Mine was the first slot on the next day. I woke up at five am, prayed God, and swallowed some biscuits I bought the previous evening from Gurunath, dressed and ran to the placement office by 6.30am. It was still dark and only one other guy was present when I went there. The case study was lengthy and before I could sort out all the papers, I had to go for an interview. It went decent and then there was an interview about my summer internship. The GD was okay too, and I felt that I can’t do it any better. After six hours of wait, and infinite prayers, I found that almost everyone else made it, except me. I rode back to my room, speaking to my mother, who was more worried. Thus started the most frustrating part of the wait.
Some companies straight away eliminated students on basis of CG, with very silly tests. In an exam, where the questions where
“1. How many sides does a triangle have?
2. What is 2563+3682? [Don’t use a calculator]
3. What are the three types of rocks?” what could be the basis of a shortlist?
Some companies sent me back straight after the written test. Out of blue came an offer from a company that offered me a job on the basis of my CG. I felt happy for the first time. [One fact they didn’t know was that I had taken their test and failed to make it to the shortlist. I was in a special shortlist for 9 pointers.] But with two famous companies coming the next days, where I rated my chances to be high, I declined to make a decision then and there. I asked for time and came back to room delighted that my CG worked finally.
The most hopeful day proved to be an equally big disaster. I didn’t have enough credentials for the good ones. In one GD, I spoke too much knowing that I can’t make it in the technical round. For the second one, my resume was cup-level. Got to know how badly I wrote it only after I opened it to see what I have written. I regretted my carelessness. During the resume submissions-exams, projects, what else and what not took precedence and I didn’t realize that I was seriously compromising on my career when carelessly filling up resumes. When I read my resume that I had filled up, I hardly doubted the fact that I won’t make it. In the GD, I got carried away by a friend, and both of us where out after that round.
Since that day, it was the same story every day. Go to GD, cup and come back. Financial Services, Investment Banks and Consulting Firms-every one drove me crazy. Almost to the point that I started doubting if there was some thing seriously wrong with me, which made me unemployable.
On the eighth day I left home for the vacation. My eyes watered as I cycled to the main gate. In the place where I lived happily for three years, life seemed to be like hell. It only seemed to show me that I was leaving like a loser. I had no ego to be pacified nor did I expect to be trend-setter, just a decent job in the first week was all that I wanted. I had no other back-ups, and at one point of time started regretting the fact that I was not apping.
I was equally undone at home. Though my parents were caring and understanding, some sense of guilt haunted me every minute. I could not stay calm and was so much lost in thought that at one point of time, my father said “Don’t worry, we have our traditional job if you don’t get one. God will take care of everything.” I spent equally uncomfortable time in Hyderabad, when I went there to visit my uncle. Memories of my days at Ramaiah, which was an equal failure came flooding in, and decapitated me still. My uncle sensing all this provided me solace with his encouraging words. I found the quickest opportunity to return to IITM and preferred spending days in front of my monitor rather than at home.
And finally I made it, on the first day of second innings. A company that didn’t want people to fight against each other in a GD, granted me an interview and the rest as they say is history.